Monday, February 25, 2008

The only thing we can plan for in life is to be surprised

Lately I have found a lot of new surprises in my life.

I applied for a job as an educational assistant. It was kind of a long shot but the interviewer and I got along famously and I got the job instantly. While I had been looking for an opportunity to advance my career I was not in any hurry. It was quite stressful to suddenly have to tie up several loose ends at my old workplace, train a new employee to my position, and tell my fellow co-workers that I was leaving, which didn't quite work out the way I had envisioned. The worst part of this process was having to leave my clients. I got thank you cards, hugs, and many goodbyes. It was a lot tougher than I thought it would be. It seemed that after 8 short months I had formed a close bond with many of them and I am so greatful for the many lessons that each one of them has provided me.

And then it all began. I guess that with higher pay I should expect bigger challenges and more stress, but I really didn't see this coming. I thought "special needs" in the school system referred to people who have disorders such as autism, down syndrome, and other challenges. It was the "other challenges" that I didn't see coming. I'm working with several teenage boys who all have oppositional defiant disorder, which is the precurser to un-detected adulthood psychopathy. Thank goodness I have some confidence and ego otherwise I would have been reduced to tears in my first week (I'm on week two right now and still holding strong, although I did get slapped around a little today). I've now been called every name in the book, threatened, and challenged. Not to say that it is all bad. I actually sat down in a desk today and didn't have every student pick up their stuff and switch seats as though i had forgotten my deodorant. There is word that I might be offered a permanent position here....dear god don't let me say yes...

On a more positive note I am finding my life settling into a very nice little routine. I go to school and I'm home by 3pm. I have time for everything I want and need to get done and time for a social life. The last two weekends have been awesome because I have had the chance to go out with friends and never check the clock, never feel the need to get going, or get something done at a certain time. It's wonderful! I've even had time to sleep! I stayed in bed until noon on saturday! Someone new in my life is teaching me all about spontaneity, something I really kind of suck at, but I love it. We have spent time driving from one random place to another doing completely random things, enjoying the outdoors, going for hikes and dog walks, and coffees, and dinners, and going to parks to look at the stars. This pace of life is completely different from what I am used to. I really am surprised by this entire turn of events - and I'm loving each and every moment!

Now you have it - Plan as you may - but life has a whole other agenda

1 comment:

Scott said...

Your looking at the random night king! I see random nights out in our future.